(Why Trying to Be Everyone Else Is Slowly Killing You)

We live in an era where most people don’t have identities, they have ‘settings’.
Someone says you’re “too quiet,” and boom, you start editing your personality like.
Someone else says you’re “too loud,” and suddenly you’re on volume control like a faulty speaker.

We live through borrowed mirrors.
We measure ourselves not by who we are, but by who others think we should be.
“I’m bad because they say I’m bad.”
“I’m successful only if they clap.”
“I’m worthy only if someone validates it.”

What’s funny or tragic, depending on the lighting, is that personal regret is dying.
People no longer regret their actions, they regret being seen doing them.
The mistake wasn’t the mistake, the problem is that someone posted it on WhatsApp status.

So we polish, rehearse, adjust, filter, trim, and perform.
We walk into rooms as a version of ourselves we think is easier for others to swallow.
And with each performance, we lose a piece of our real selves.
A slow, quiet personality erosion.

It gets worse when the things you do to impress others don’t align with your soul.
Pretending is easy, until your spirit starts coughing like,
“Hey, this isn’t me. Can we go home?”

We Think Too Much About Others and Too Little About Ourselves

We consume too much; content, opinions, trends, and expectations.
We think so much about how others shape our lives that nothing seems to come from within anymore.

“We go to church to make our family happy.”
“We buy the latest phone because everyone else is buying.”
“We attend events because we were invited (even though we’d rather sleep).”

And with every imitation, we lose just a little more individuality.
I know people who can give you a full biography of a random influencer; date of birth, favorite color, height, even their dog’s name, but they can’t answer the simplest question:

“What makes you happy?”

Not the trending happiness.
Not the Instagram happiness.
Not the “others will approve this” happiness.
But your happiness.

There’s no guarantee that what brings me joy will bring you joy.
People forget this because they’re busy copying lifestyles they can’t even sustain emotionally (or financially).

We Fear Being Weird (But Maybe Weird Is the Real Normal)

Society has everyone convinced that being weird is a crime.
You laugh too loud? “Embarrassing.”
You like odd hobbies? “Cringe.”
You don’t follow trends? “Uncultured.”
You mind your own business? “Anti-social.”

Meanwhile, the people we admire most; the creatives, innovators, rule-breakers, were all considered weird at some point.

Maybe weird is what’s real.
Maybe the outliers are the ones still alive inside.
Because they follow what makes them happy, not what makes others comfortable.
They say what everyone is afraid to say.
They confront disrespect instead of swallowing it “to avoid drama.”
They choose themselves first and unapologetically.

There is something refreshing about people who are, just themselves.
Not the over-edited, public-friendly version.
The raw, unfiltered, “this is who I am, take it or leave it” version.

Surround Yourself With People Who Allow You to Be You

I like people, genuinely.
But I like the kind who allow me to be myself without rearranging me to fit their preferences.
People who watch, not to judge, but to witness.
People whose presence makes me comfortable.

Everyone is walking their own path.
But the path gets darker, narrower, and heavier when you’re carrying everyone’s opinions like luggage.

Imagine hiking uphill carrying 30 other people’s expectations.
It’s tiring.
It’s unnecessary.
And honestly, it’s not your job.

So let’s drop the baggage.
Let’s be ourselves; inconveniently, imperfectly, beautifully.
Let’s have more fun.
Life is too short to pretend to be a lifestyle you don’t even enjoy.

Give Me Real People

I would rather sit with a real, unfiltered soul; someone who admits their fears, laughs freely, thinks deeply, and isn’t afraid to be strange than sit with a fake, manufactured philosopher performing wisdom for social approval.

Authenticity isn’t glamorous.
It’s not polished.
It doesn’t always look good on camera.
But it’s honest.
And honesty is a rare currency now.

Be weird.
Be real.
Be yourself, loudly or quietly, whichever feels natural.

Because the world doesn’t need another copy. It needs someone who dares to be an original.